I am so frustrated right now.

My mom has been harassing me about my…shall we call him…my fiance, and I am sick of it.

She just called me at work to complain about his socks being on the floor in my room, and asking what time he’ll be home.

It’s always something. At this point, I am tired of her complaining about him, tired of his doing stupid shit for her to complain to me, and I am damn near tired of him.

I love him, but I’;m not in love with him, and getting back together with him was a big, huge mistake. I really thiunk we should have stayed friends….

The whole business of him staying with me is a big ball of sad happenstances… but he’s here now , better or worse.

Him being here made me realize all I want is to be left alone…with maybe a booty call or someone to hang out with, but nothing serious.

I need space to breathe.

All we do is argue…ironiaclly about me needing space.

I don’t have time for a full time lover…or a full time anything, really.

I am taking 18 credits in school, I work 16 hours every weekend, AND I have my online biz, AND I actually have to make things for my biz.

I really don’t have time, and the little time I do have, I

  1. sleep
  2. knit/crochet
  3. (try to) read and keep up to date with the world
  4. blog

And most of these things get done in between everything I mentioned above.

The only day I have 100% free is friday…..and you can bet that I want to sleep all day.

So what should I do?

I have no idea.

My mom gave him until the end of April to leave, so I have to put up with all this nonsense until then.

But then…the drama will start, when he’ll realize that I ain’t moving out with him (which I’ve pretty much hinted at already).

As you may or may not have gathered, we were together at one point, then I left him, and then we started speaking again, and started going out again. He was originally just supposed to visit me for a week after Xmas, and then go back on his merry way back to Rochester, but his parents were dead set against him going to see me, and they ceremoniously kicked him out. My mom offered to let him stay with us (originally) until March, at which point the both of us were supposed to find an apt. or a room to rent.

Circumstances, circumstances.

He got a decent job as a security guard (thanks to my coaxing to get his security license) and now he’s doing a whole bunch of shit to piss my mom off. She’s a very funny person who likes things a certain way, and is totally anal about cleanliness. He’s sloppy by nature, and leaving dirty socks, cups, and other debris lying around is what he does (and his parents certainly don’t/didn’t discourage it either).

So naturally they are extreme opposites and was destined to clash.

My mom feels that if you’re staying at someone’s house (for FREE, EVEN) that you should follow whatever rules they have and just be grateful in general (I agree). also, since it isn’t your house, even if you’re a total slob at your own house, you should be extra neat wherever it is you might be staying (I also agree). She feels he’s taking advantage of the situation.

i think he;s taking advantage of her hospitality, and I am sick of it. It;s bad enough he;s taken over my room and I am forced to bunk with my sister (my mom’s old school, and won’t let us sleep together….I was mad at first, but now I’m relieved).

And he’s annoying. I can’t do anything (when he’s around) without him breathing down my neck and whining that I don’t spend enough time with him (notwithstanding what I explained above; before school started, I spent quite a bit of time with him).

Arrgh, I just want to be left alone.


One thought on “Grrr….

  1. Annamarya says:

    Miss, either you call me or I’ll call you so we can chitchat about this. When you’re done with work (when the run ends), you get your ass to Philly for a de-stressing weekend.


Thanks for the love <3

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